Hospital

That's not really a title more of a location. I'm sat in the waiting room in the phlebotomy clinic, not for me this time but Bex needs twice weekly blood tests.

She came home from hospital on Tuesday after a meeting with the Mental Health team, they were encouraged by how well she had done over the five days. She put on nearly a kilo and managed to cope with the ' alien' environment, ironically one of the biggest struggles was not with the eating regime but the other patients on the ward. Sadly two ladies with dementia were very challenging .

The team felt that the best course of action for Bex was structured, observed meal times, but that she could be at home and just come in three times a day.

Firstly they are concentrating on improving and adding to her diet, eventually all the other anxieties and concerns will be dealt with, but everything is done in stages.

We will be involved in weekly family meetings, helpful to all of us, as none of us have had any real experience with any of this, but thankfully we are all supporting each other.

I'm now siting outside the 'home' in town where Becky has her meals-she has to be here for around an hour for breakfast, lunch and supper, and has been told that as well as absolutely no exercise, it's best not to drive either.

So far her routine seems to be eat, sleep, repeat.

I ( and a growing team of helpers) are doing the running around, dog walking, lifts, food shopping for her and us etc.

She is finding it incredibly hard, both physically and mentally, her body is trying its best to adjust to dealing with far more food than it has done in the last ten years and that's tough.

We all know ( her included) that at last she is getting the help she needs and it's all for the greater good, but that doesn't help the nausea and stomach cramps.

Do not fear though as the flugelhorn, cello playing Calvary in the shape of my sister is arriving tomorrow. She has, I am well informed, a large Mary Poppins bag full of useful things.

All her gardening tools so she can prune, weed and use my new lawn mower..... Yes I have an early Christmas present from my father in law, he heard my cursing whilst using the toy one a few weeks ago and dragged Jack and Steph to a well known hardware store that does 10% discount for the elderly ( he is a Jersey boy) and bought one.

Alas too late he realised he'd been tricked into buying the pair of them lunch too, but as they they have his best interests at heart they used the establishment on the pier at Rozel, so he had some pension money left over.

We won't get much cash out of my sister, she's married to a northerner. They have it tough up there, I told her to bring her swimsuit as the sea is positively balmy, although the endless list of jobs I have lined up for her gives her little time for pleasure activities. ( not that swimming in the sea at this time of year is pleasurable, well only for AH)

I haven't made a Christmas cake yet, so I hope she's bought her chefs hat, plus I've especially left three weeks of ironing , two weeks of washing and the kitchen tiles to scrub.

Shame she's only here until Wednesday .

Now a short piece of info about me. The same day we had a meeting with the MH team at the hospital about Bex, I had a meeting with my consultant for about thirty minutes and then my oncologist.

The most recent CT scan shows that the disease has progressed, and I now have tumours in my chest cavity ( not my lungs thankfully). If we do nothing it's only going to get a whole lot worse.

They spoke about me at great lengths in the MDT meeting, and decided that the ONLY option I have is to go down the chemo route.

This is why I met up with NB the oncologist - we spent about an hour with him ( thanks SW for being there) and ran through what is likely to happen .

On the 29th I have my pre chemo bloods taken and a 'chat', the side effects have been explained , thinning hair, loss of some high notes in hearing, tiredness , fatigue, nausea, neuropathy etc etc.

He feels I will respond well to this drug as I have in the past, the HUGE downside is my suppressed bone marrow, this could give me real trouble as it's already low to start with, and is only going to get knocked down further.

We are starting with the lowest dose possible, the idea being to have it weekly ( it'll take four to five hours to administer and I'm sure I will be closely monitored ) .

Am I scared? You bet I am, I've been on thin ice for a while, and now I feel like I'm on the slippery slope, but listen....... I don't hear any fat lady singing so it's not over yet!


Must just mention when Bex and I left the hospital last week, there was a lot of stuff to pack up, it's amazing what you can accumulate in a short space of time. I had a very small bright red 'wheelie' case as well as lots of carrier bags. The case is quite old and had been used in the young farmers concert a few years back, plus Dan had recently borrowed it for someone.

Unbeknown to me the wheel was loose, a third of the way down the hospital corridor, after it left a long black mark , it fell off.
This left me looking like a "Mr Bean" as I dragged the semi broken case making an unearthly noise the rest of the way past the bay's, into the lift and out of the hospital , very embarrassing but quite funny too.

Lastly, thanks for the cards/ flowers/ and get well wishes for Bex, we are at last to coin my husbands phrase "moving forward". :-)







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