Saturday 9th June

What a difference a month makes...it was May 7th that I went for my routine blood test at the hospital feeling tired and out of sorts, not fully understanding why the bloods seem to register all fine, but I felt pretty low, and 'the cough' had started.

Thinking naively that I had picked up a harsh chest infection of some sort, and that antibiotics would soon rectify the situation. Little did I realise that my CA125 count (cancer marker) that I try not to enquire after, had raced back into the thousands again, and seemingly so quickly.

They (the professionals) think that whilst the little chemo I had December/January/February did the trick whilst I was having it, the cancer cells have become resistant to the platin.

This is why I am now on Taxol, again weekly, and fingers crossed it eases the symptoms ie shrinks the tumours, dries up the fluid/lymph alleviates the coughing spasms , breathing difficulties and enables me to at least go back to being able to walk and talk simultaneously... the shock and suddenness has been overwhelming and has made my life so restrictive so incredibly quickly.

I've just spent the last thirty minutes researching ovarian cancer/ lymphangitis plural effusions, and all the possible procedures/treatments. I now have brain overload, and I only wanted to copy and paste some stuff to make it easier for folks to understand!

That aside, how has this week been, not too bad (although not too good either). The family have been incredibly patient, supportive, witty, and often downright rude, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

I have managed to do some sllloooowwww dog walks, a half hearted pilates and yoga class, shopped a bit, eaten a bit, rested a lot, and generally coughed a huge amount.

I've gratefully received home made meals, bouquets of flowers, and many kind offers of help with anything I need. Truly humbling and overwhelming.

It was decided on Thursday that Hospice needed to step in and offer up their 'care package', so rather than me seeking out help/assistance with the various hospital departments, I just had the one point of contact that would be available 24/7.

Friday morning Jack came back from work so he could be there when the nurse from Hospice came, it seems as if I'll get weekly home visits. I've had counselling sessions with her before, so a friendly face and a building of trust has started. She has also organised me with some liquid morphine, (of which I had a very small dose last night).

Isn't it supposed  to knock you out? 3 am and i was still awake... last day of steroids tomorrow, they, like the morphine are designed to suppress the inflammation in my lungs, ease coughing, let me sleep.....

The Netball girls are organising a "walking netball tournament" next Saturday 16th, all in aid of my charity, which has to be Ovacome. I would have loved to actually take part, but even that is way beyond my capabilities at the present time.

I'm going to finish now, as I feel thats enough news for tonight, and would like to end with some happy pictures.



Dog walks with Tom....

 Two little 'flower girls'

 St Ouenais family...

Dog walks with Dan

 Out with GOOD friends Xxx